Pushing Back Darkness

This post is written by Deborah Lange.  This was written after her second mission trip to Sierra Leone in 4 months. 

I’ve run into alot of different responses from people when they found out where I spent most of my summer; on the other side of the world in Sierra Leone, Africa one of the poorest country in the world.  Most people were intrigued and inspired and some were shocked, perplexed or disinterested.
A very common response I hear goes something like, ‘ wow I bet that made you thankful for what you have now ‘ or ‘we don’t realize how lucky we are in America, they probably have nothing.’

Its true.  I used to take fresh water, air conditioning and unlimited food resources for granted everyday.  The Sierra Leoneons don’t get to experience the daily luxuries like that which we here in America enjoy without even noticing.
Life is very difficult in Africa.  Poverty is everywhere.  Many have no education at all.  Tremendous suffering is everywhere.

However, when I reflect on my time in Africa, living as the Africans do.  I don’t relish in the wireless Internet I have at my fingertips now, the air conditioned room I’m sitting in, or the ice cold Sonic cherry limeade I’m sipping on.

In fact, I feel the sting of something I had in Africa.  Something which we lack in America.

I grieve for the millions of Americans who lack this but don’t even realize it.

We’ve filled our lives and country with all the things we “need” credit cards, wal-marts, cellphones, computers, pharmacies and the list goes on…but we’ve missed out on something so much greater, something that is life changing, something I believe we are suffering without.

Now I can hear you saying, but wait, those are all good things.  And yes it’s true, used properly all of those things can be good things in our lives.

But we depend on those things.  Not God.

I thought I knew what dependence on God looked like, and I strived to grow in that area.  But until I went to Africa I had no idea how much the modern conveniences, financial resources and the medical advances available to me had blocked my ability to have total dependance on God, thus blocking my ability to grow that much closer in communion with Him.
What most of us see as ‘missing’ in Africa is actually the very thing that has enabled them to have what we Americans are missing the most;  an intimate, personal and real relationship with God.

Without the convience of easy access to food, doctors, medicine, transportation and super markets the Africans I was with are forced to rely on God, completely.  They have nowhere else to turn but to Him – for everything.  They must live their lives in daily surrender and dependence on Him in all things.  Its a beautiful thing.

This truth hit me particularly hard one evening while in Sierra Leone when I had just arrived back at the orphanage from a soccer match.  I was walking through the girls dorm when I noticed one of the missionaries in bed and very sick, she had a headache and raging high fever.
I immediately stepped into the next room and called a group of the African girls, explained to them that Madison was very sick and asked them to come pray for her.  I then continued downstairs to get a wet cloth to try and cool her off with.
As I came back up the hallway and heard the beautiful chorus of African voices praying faithfully and confidently for healing for Madison and saw them surrounding her small bed.  Tears welled up in my eyes.  It was so beautiful and refreshing.

I knew that this was how things need to be.  How I should live.

Back in America my first my response easily would of been to run for the tylenol bottle or thermometer.  But pray?  Why is prayer a last result most of the time?  It should be the first.

Why do I turn first to healing remedies not the Healer himself?

Now let me explain, we did take tylenol and other medicine with us and gave what we had to the kids at the orphanage when they were sick and of course they took it.  But it was blatantly clear that they knew where the true healing came from, and there trust and hope was absolutely not in the medicine or medical knowledge we shared with them, But in God, the true Healer.
I saw similar examples of the Africans total reliance on God in so many different ways during my trip.  I was inspired, challenged and convicted.  I desire God to be that real in my life.  Of course I would say He is the answer to sickness, war, financial trouble, and relationships.  But is my life declaring this too?  Do I give Him the chance to be my answer in all these things.

Yes its true in Africa there are many astonishing miracles and acts of God happening.  But wouldn’t we also experience that if we gave Him the chance to show Himself to us like that?

But instead we cling to our materialism, conveniences and our human wisdom and push God back for just the ‘really big’ issues.

But I refuse to do this anymore.  I’ve seen it, lived it and glimpsed what it would be like in my life, and it is to glorious and wonderful to see God alive and active in all aspects of life.  I don’t want to go back to not having that.

This post was written by Amy Kernal who is staying at the Wellington orphanage in Sierra Leone for 6 months as a tutor.

I come today with a broken heart.

Around a month ago I did a medical clinic with a team. At that clinic I saw a little boy that broke my heart in a million pieces. He was around eleven months but looked more like four months. His mother passed away and his father did not know how to care for him. So the baby’s aunt took him in. All the baby was eating was rice. He had very bad sores on his bottom and he cried all the time.

When I first saw him I started to cry. I knew he was not doing well and if he did not get better care he would die. I had to leave the room and pray. I cried out to God, “Why is this precious child suffering when so many people have plenty?” I talked to the leader of team and ask if we could do anything. He gave some money to the aunt to get formula. The doctor told the aunt, “She needs to hold and love on him or he will die. I wanted to run and take that baby so bad it hurt. I thought I could take care of him at the home.

I talked to the pastor the other day that knew her and the story. He gave her the formula and the baby was doing better, then he started to get sick.

The pastor sent them to the hospital to get better care. I wish I could tell you he is fine now and some day he will be running and laughing but that’s not the reality.

He did not make it, he is now in the loving arms of our father. I have cried over and over for this boy I only met once. He is God’s child and he calls us to look after his children and the down cast. I have heard of children dying of hunger, we all have, but to see it with my own eyes is something totally different.

I thank God for giving me a deep love for this nation. We can not just sit on our lazy boys and let this happen. God calls us to go out in all the nations. “The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few.” Matthew 9:37.

I know not all of us are called to come to Africa. There are people all over the world in need. But for me, these are my people and I ask for your prayers for me to love them even deeper.

I guess I will get off my box now. If you would like to help the people of Sierra Leone you can send a one time or monthly donation to 4-him.net. Just take a few moments to read what they’re doing around the world and see how you can help.

“What good is it, my brothers, if a man claims to have faith but has no deeds?  Can such faith save him?  Suppose a brother or sister is without clothes and daily food.  If one of you says to him, go I wish you well, keep warm and well fed, but does nothing about his physical needs, what good is it?  In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead.  James 2:14-16

Thanks for your support.

With Love,
Amy Kernal

While I was in Sierra Leone my husband and I sent a few emails back and forth to each other.  I decided to share them for a few reasons.  They give you insight into what God was doing in me while I was there and in him while he was here.  We were very much partnering beyond space and time to love the people of Sierra Leone.  Second, I wanted you to see what an amazing man I am married to   We have been married for 11 years and I grow more in love with him each year!  I hope you enjoy these letters!  Oh and to help fill in the blanks, he refers to me as a stripper because I was a topless dancer for 4 years.  He also refers to me as fatherless because I did not meet my dad until I was 5 and he is not involved in my life.  Also, I had our 9 year old son and 18 year old god daughter with me while our 6 and 4 year old sons were at home with him.  When I refer to Solomon, he is our oldest African son.  He lives in Sierra Leone and is in his first year of college.  When I refer to ‘the girls’ they are in a teenaged girls bible study I lead in America.  I brought them with me.  One more thing, these have not been altered in anyway so that you would be able to feel the raw emotion of where we were both at.  OK…enjoy!

My love,

Solomon has internet on his computer now. Sorry I didn’t call again like I said. I will get some more phone cards in the next few days. It was so wise of you to suggest Micah stay at the home with the kids and not go to the remote villages. He had such a good time the last few days. He has really bonded with Solomon, Gabriel and today another little boy named Bernard. He says he is not homesick. The only problem he has had the last few days is getting hungry HA! He has been playing so much. The kids love him!!! I am so glad you let him come. Thank you. It was nice to have the last few mornings to have a quiet time with the missionaries gone. But I am glad they are back. It sounds like the girls all had a great time. Steve said they visited a school for the blind and they all cried and cried. I am so glad the Lord made a way for them all to come! He is moving in their hearts. They asked me before they left for the provinces if they could sponsor some of the kids. Jerome, I am amazed at all that God has done and is doing. I know it is a great sacrifice each time you let me go. Thank you for supporting me. You have no idea what it is doing for me and for the kids. I know that I cannot even fully comprehend all He is doing. As usual I feel VERY weak in my emotions, so please pray for me. BUT, He has been faithful to perfect His strength through my weakness. He is so faithful, even when I am not.

I miss the boys. I want to hear their voice. I will try to call the tomorrow. Is your sister keeping them some? Are they having fun with my mom? How are they? Do they miss Micah?

OK…well pray for me. Pray for me to be emptied more and more of myself so more of His love can flow through me.

Thank you again for being so amazing! You are the best husband and daddy in the entire universe. I DO NOT DESERVE YOU!!!!!

I love you,
me

Sweet Shanna,

How blessed I am to be married to one who is so dedicated to His work. Truly I could say “How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news!” (but those are not my words, they are His). It brings me such joy to hear of the Love (His Love) you are sharing with His special children. But my joy is weak and fleeting my flesh cannot sustain it. But His joy is Great and Everlasting. He is so pleased with you! Know that one day He will return and bring with Him great honor for your name. Just as you are bringing Honor for His name. The rich and righteous will be sitting at home enjoying their pleasures and delighting in there “righteousness.” But you will be in the fields harvesting for the GREAT ONE! The one who takes the “stripper” and gives her great wisdom and beauty! The one who takes the “fatherless” and makes her “mother” to the nations. That is why He is called “Jesus Messiah.” That is why He has the “name above all names.” What a blessed redeemer. He who saves the lowly ones and raises them to GREATNESS! He came so we could know HIS NAME! And in you I see His name!

Some will ask why does He allow such pain on this earth. It is so we can know HIS great name! If it were not for the pain in your life. I would not have really known His name. To see one who the world would say “after what she has been through she will never amount to anything” then in turn become a healer to the world. How beautiful! Now I know HIS name even more. May He be exalted through your life. May he receive Blessing and Honor through your life. The Creator of the Universe receives Blessing and Honor through you. How could someone SO great get Honor out of people so in their own strength. Yahweh HOLY IS YOUR NAME! May YOU receive BLESSING AND HONOR AND GLORY AND POWER from Shanna. Other “gods” will look to the “great” but You are HOLY You have looked to us the “weak and powerless” the “stripper” and “fatherless.” How I love to praise Your Name. How You have scripted my life. Thank You for giving me Shanna! She brings me great Honor at the gates of all cities. Others will say “look how she has changed her life.”  But they will all see the truth. They will see that “Jesus has overcome.”  That He has risen from the dead and made His home in the heart of the “Stripper.”  And one day He will come again and they will see Him in all of His Glory come to you and bestow on you a glory that will shine for all eternity. They will see HIM wash your feet as you have washed the feet of HIS children. They will see HIM embrace you for all eternity. What a GREAT DAY that will be! I am honored to be with you until that day.

Thank you
Your Second Love

My Love,

You are so precious to me. You are the best husband in the world. Thank you for your encouragement. I am longing to call and hear your voice, but it is raining really heavy here and Solomon is down the hill where he stays so I don’t have a phone. Micah is doing so well. He has played so much. He has bonded with all of the kids. Each day he has taken a little more alone time in the room but I am certain it was God’s plan for him to come!

Jerome, everything is going so well. Today we went to the beach. It rained the whole time so we could not spread John’s (Amy’s husbands) ashes in the ocean like we planned. On the way back she started crying so we shared my ipod and listened to the gateway worship songs and worshipped together. Could you make her a CD with worship music and I could send it for her to put on her ipod.

We had a spontaneous worship time last night with some of the kids…it was precious.

The African girls have done so good on their bible study. I am so impressed.

Why do I doubt God, He always prompts me to do things out of my comfort zone when I am here and I always resist, but yet He has so much grace and mercy. Once I finally obey He perfects His strength in my weakness.

I went to go to bed last night and Victoria was on the balcony. We talked for 20 minutes or so. I told her about you and how I longed for her to have a husband like you one day. Just telling her how you have loved me to a place of healing when I was so wounded, and how you have loved our children, and how you consistently seek God year after year, despite all the distractions of life, and how you encourage me to come to Sierra Leone, and to reach out to others. That is what I want for her and all of these girls. I know that by the love they have for God and eventually for their husband and children, they will change their nation. I know I could not be the godly woman I am today without your love. I want so desperately for them to have this. Will you pray for God to bring them each someone who will love the Lord and them as much as you love Jesus and me.

The boys are also doing well. They have all been interacting with Micah. At first he was a little resistant to the affection of their culture. But now He is use to it. They don’t get tired of his constant playing. They play with him the way you do. They wrestle and laugh and have so much fun. I pray that Micah will be influenced by them long after he returns home. I pray that he will show the same love to his brothers that has been shown to him.

As usual I feel like I have so much love and not enough time to pour it out. I feel like I should be doing more, spending more time, but when I feel anxious or overwhelmed I just ask God to give me the grace to trust Him. I know He is covering all of my shortcomings in His grace. I am praying that every move I make, every word I speak would be in His spirit…that I would do His will. I am so weak and faced with my humanness. But He is greater than my heart, though my heart and flesh may fail, He is the strength of my heart. Oh how I love him!

Jerome, your email means so much to me. I do not know how you see me the way you do. I know myself and I don’t see the way you do. BUT I know that God is allowing you to see things through His eyes. I agree with you, how can a perfect and holy God love us so intimately and choose to love others through us. How does He take the lowly, the broken and use them the way He does. There is no one like Him. No one. I would choose Him again and again. Thank you for being faithful to love me for all of these years. Thank you for having compassion on me. Thank you for not minimizing my pain. Thank you for all the times you held me when I cried, all of the times you encouraged me when I was weak, all of the times you have spoken truth over my life. I am more aware than ever that I am here right now, this very minute because of God through you. You will never know the gratitude I have for you loving and leading me closer to the heart of God.

I am praying for you to have intimate times of worship, fun times with the boys, times of rest, and to not be distracted from God. I am praying whatever He is doing in me He will do in you too as a reward for your sacrifice.

I am so sorry I haven’t called again. I promise to call you tomorrow.

I love you so much sweet husband!

I have the honor of leading a bible study for teenaged girls. Each week we meet in our home and share the highs and lows of our week, discuss the scriptures and pray together. Of course with lots of eating and laughing in between!

These are not ordinary teenaged girls. These are beautiful young women flourishing in the light of God’s love. They are the fragrance of Christ in this generation. I see Him raising them up to make a significant difference for the kingdom of God.

Since the Lord took me to Sierra Leone for the first time a year ago the girls joined my efforts in loving the children of the Wellington Orphanage. We began praying for the kids when we would meet for bible study each week. The girls started writing them letters. Their hearts were enlarged for these orphaned children half way around the world whom they had never met. It was precious to see their hearts come alive with compassion for these kids.

One by one they began asking if they could go with me to meet the children. As they got permission from the Lord and their parents we planned the trip. They began doing fund-raisers and engaging in all of the ground work that goes into planning a mission trip. They went out during the week and sold sonic cards. They had bake sales and car washes on the weekends. They came to extra meetings. They poured their time, energy and love into the lives of the children before they ever met them.

When we finally arrived in Sierra Leone their love deepened instantly for the kids. I knew it would! As I watched them over the next 12 days I could literally see His compassion pouring through their lives into these rescued ones! I would pass by their room at the end of the night and listen in on their excited conversations about all God was doing in their hearts.

One evening when I was telling them goodnight, they all began frantically asking me what they had to do to sponsor kids God had connected to their hearts too. These are American teenaged girls willing to give $30 a month to sponsor a child in the poorest nation of the world. I can barely type this without crying.

As they ventured out into the villages of West Africa the work of God only increased in their hearts. They spent time with people in remote villages that rarely see white people, dancing and celebrating with them. They visited a school for the blind where they wept at the challenges the children faced. 

They went with me to a polio camp to deliver rice to hungry families. When we returned they asked me if they could pitch in their money and buy all of the children in the polio community shoes. I was convicted by their willing sacrifice.

One of my primary goals for this trip to Sierra Leone was to teach the girls of the Wellington Orphanage a simple, systematic form of bible study. I wanted to teach them something they could do in their own quiet times whether the missionaries were there or not. I wanted to spark in them a hunger to know God’s word in context and instill in them a confidence to study with only the help of the Holy Spirit to teach them.

The American girls and I had been studying James together before the trip. We decided to teach the African girls what God had been teaching us. As preparation each of the girls led group for a week before we came. They did everything from start our high/low discussion to sharing their outline of the text, to leading us in a time of prayer.

Amy Kernal and I set up the African girls in small groups and the American girls paired up in leading the groups. We used the same format as our weekly meeting here in America.

I was amazed. It was the most precious picture you could ever see. All those beautiful young women with skin color of every shade studying the bible, praying, laughing and fellowshipping together as one family.

The last session Amy Kernal gave her testimony of God’s faithfulness to her through the loss of her husband John. Deborah Lange also shared the testimony of God’s faithfulness to her family when they lost her dad to cancer.  Our small groups that day were focused on praying. Our prayers were to center around thanking God for His faithfulness in times of loss and deep pain.

There were small groups of girls in every corner and crevasse of the crowded orphanage. My group was downstairs and above us another group was gathered. As my group was praying I could hear the girls above us begin to sing a worship song together. I could hear the American and African voices intermingled in praise to the God who had poured love over each of their many wounds. It was such a sweet sound.

My heart was filled with deep gratitude for God giving me such a gift. Because of the love, devotion, sacrifice and service of each young woman in that home I was brought closer to the Lord than ever before. Some of those girls would be going back to America with me and some would be staying. No matter what, I knew that time or space could not separate the spiritual bond of love the Lord had created between all of us. Without saying a word we all realized we were one family in Christ…for all of eternity. 

Each one of these girls are world-changers. Some live in America, some in Africa, but they are pouring out God’s love all over the earth through their love, prayers and service.

As the American teenaged girls are settling back into their own culture they know this is not their true home. Their home is in heaven and they are on a pilgrimage. They are wrestling out how to be a light to their own nation while pouring God’s love into a tiny country on the coast of West Africa. I am confident that God will show them how to do both. They have a strong love and devotion for Jesus that will affect the world for years to come. They are the light and salt of the earth just as the African girls are a city on a hill. Together as one family they are invading the earth with the grace and mercy of God!

I am honored the Lord is allowing me to watch it unfold. I am begging Him to always allow me to partner with my precious daughters in His kingdom’s work of love. It is one of my greatest desires.

Madison, Raeann, Wendy, Hope, Shayla, Megan, Deborah, Hayley, Kristina, Becca and Sierra…I am so proud of you.

Hayley, Becca, Kristina and Sierra thank you for loving the kids through prayer and letter-writing, I know one day you will meet them face to face.

If, like the teenaged girls, you would like to sponsor a child in the Wellington Orphanage for $30 a month you can do so by going here 4HIM